Thinking Of You
by PermanentMarkerSniffer
Summary: Songfic: Bella contemplates why she ever chose Edward. Or something along the lines of that. Bella/Jacob


Thinking of You

Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer and 'Thinking of You' belongs to Katy Perry.

_Comparisons are easily done_

_Once you've had a taste of perfection_

_Like an apple hanging from a tree_

_I pick the ripest one. I still go the seed._

Bella was lying on her side in bed, watching her man read. Since it wasn't possible for them to sleep, there wasn't much to do after sex besides staring at each other.

Edward says this is 'romantic'. I on the other hand, think it is creepy. But, I put up with it. There really wasn't anything else to do so I closed my eyes and went to a hidden place in my mind. It was filled with my most treasured person, Jacob.

_You said move on, where do I go?_

_I guess second best is all I will know_

I went back to the time where we had our first real kiss, before Victoria and the newborns attacked.

I thought back further to all the times he hugged me so tight when Edward was around, just to get him jealous, and most of the time it worked.

I open one eye to peek back at Edward and feel relieved that although he has the power of telepathy, he is still blocked from my mind.

I open the other eye and put on a false smile when I notice him looking at me peculiarly, his book forgotten on his lap.

I meet his gaze and miss the feeling of looking into Jacob's chocolate brown orbs.

'_Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you (Thinking of you, thinking of you)_

_Thinking of you, what you would do_

_If you were the one who was spending the night (Spending the night, spending the night)_

_Oh I wish that I was looking into your eyes_

Edward set his book aside and pulled me into his cold, stone-like embrace and placed his chin on the top of my head.

_You're like an Indian Summer in the middle of Winter_

_Like a hard candy with a surprise centre_

_How do I get better once I've had the best?_

_You said there's tons of fish in the water, so the waters I will test_

I snuggled into his body and couldn't help comparing him with the one I truly love.

Jacob was the complete opposite to Edward in temperature. Whereas Edward and the rest of the family were cold as ice, Jacob was sizzling hot. But not just in the way you would call someone sexy, actually hot.

Where their personalities come in, Edward not only was quiet and boring on the outside, but also on the inside. Jacob was loud, bubbly, outgoing and happy nearly all the time, which made me cheer up whenever I am around him.

With my first time, I'd never tell Edward this, but it was with Jacob. It happened when Edward left us in the tent for a while; when he ran off to fight Victoria's army.

When that moment was over, he also left to fight. Before he did, he whispered that I needed to stay with Edward, that my vampire was nothing without me.

_He kissed my lips; I taste your mouth, oh!_

_(Taste your mouth)_

_He pulled me in, I was disgusted with myself_

Edward turned me around and kissed me tenderly; I closed my eyes and deepened it. It was so unlike him I thought I was dreaming and in this dream it was Jacob that I was kissing. Edward mistook my submitting to his kiss and roughened it up, starting to grope me. On other occasions I would have liked this but not I was not in the mood. So I pulled away and rolled over to face the wall.

'_Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you_

_(Thinking of you, thinking of you)_

_Thinking of you, what you would do_

_If you were the one who was spending the night_

_(Spending the night, spending the night)_

_Oh, I wish that I was looking into_

The next day, I rushed to where Edward was sitting, after reading an extremely raunchy romance novel. I straddled his lap so he could feel how needy I was for him. I looked into his eyes and they widened. Instantly, he chucked me over his shoulder and ran to our room.

The whole time we made love I was unfaithful in my mind. But the worst part was that I didn't care. The whole time I was reading that book I thought of Jacob doing all that stuff to me and I was still thinking it now.

_You're the best, and yes I do regret_

_How I could let myself let you go_

_Now, now the lessons learned_

_I touched it, I was burned_

_Oh, I think you should know!_

It has been a month since I'd been partially unfaithful. Also, since that I have been thinking of Jacob through all my time with Edward and when I am alone, I remind myself how stupid I was to choose Edward over him.

'_Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you_

_(Thinking of you, thinking of you)_

_Thinking of you, what you would do_

_If you were the one who was spending the night_

_(Spending the night, spending the night)_

_Oh, I wish that I was looking into your, your eyes_

_Looking into your eyes, looking into your eyes_

Edward was getting worried; I hadn't been doing anything with him in a while.

Every time he asks I blow him off, telling him I need to hunt or I don't feel like it.

I was still thinking all about Jacob and I couldn't do anything about it. I can't go back to him now that I have turned. I don't really want my lover to look at me like I've rolled in garbage.

I sighed and once again tried to get him off my mind by turning on the radio. But it was the ending of this song that would have made me cry if I was still able to.

_Oh, won't you walk through?_

_And bust in that door and take me away?_

_Oh, no more mistakes_

'_Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay, stay_

_**A/N: Hey, thanks for reading! Please leave me your thoughts about my first Songfic. (: Thank you!**_


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